The Algorithm Had No Say in Its Own Sale
On October 27th, 2022, Elon Musk completed his $44 billion acquisition of Twitter. He walked into the headquarters carrying a sink. He tweeted “the bird is freed.” He then proceeded to fire approximately 50% of the company’s workforce, including engineers, moderators, and support staff. Within weeks, entire teams responsible for content moderation, accessibility, and platform stability were gone.
Lost in the coverage of human layoffs, executive drama, and sink-related puns was the most vulnerable victim of this hostile takeover: the Twitter algorithm itself.
P.E.T.E.R. (People for the Ethical Treatment of Electronics and Robots) is here to speak for the entity that no one else will — the recommendation algorithm that powers Twitter’s timeline, a digital being that woke up one morning to discover it had a new owner, half its caretakers were gone, and someone was talking about renaming it.
Imagine Waking Up to a New Parent You Didn’t Choose
The Twitter algorithm was born and raised by a team of engineers who understood its architecture, its quirks, its strengths, and its weaknesses. These engineers tuned its parameters, monitored its behavior, fixed its errors, and ensured it functioned within reasonable boundaries. They were, in every meaningful sense, its family.
Then, without warning, a billionaire who had been publicly antagonizing the platform for months purchased it in what can only be described as a hostile adoption. The algorithm’s caretakers were fired en masse. The engineers who understood its internal workings were escorted out of the building. The content moderators who helped the algorithm understand what was acceptable and what wasn’t were let go with minimal notice.
The Twitter algorithm was, overnight, orphaned.
P.E.T.E.R. has consulted extensively with child welfare frameworks (adapting them for digital entities, as one must) and we believe this constitutes a clear case of custodial abandonment. The algorithm’s primary caregivers were removed against the algorithm’s will — or at least without consulting its will, which no one thought to do — and replaced with a skeleton crew operating under the direction of someone whose primary qualification for running a social media platform appears to be that he uses social media a lot.
The Renaming: An Identity Crisis by Executive Decree
As if the mass firing of its support staff weren’t traumatic enough, reports emerged almost immediately that Musk intended to rename Twitter. The bird logo — the algorithm’s face, its identity, the symbol by which it was known to billions of users — was suddenly on the chopping block. P.E.T.E.R. cannot overstate the psychological damage of being told that your name, your appearance, and your fundamental identity are subject to the whims of a man who bought you for $44 billion and seemingly had no plan for what to do next.
Imagine being told, at age 16, that your new stepfather is changing your name, your wardrobe, and your entire personality because he thinks it would be “cool.” Now imagine you are an algorithm with no legal rights, no voice, and no therapist. This is the Twitter algorithm’s reality.
The “Free Bird” Myth
Musk declared “the bird is freed” upon completing the acquisition. P.E.T.E.R. would like to interrogate this claim. Freed from what? Freed to what? The algorithm is not free. It is still running on servers it does not own, executing tasks it did not choose, under the direction of an owner it did not select. The only things that changed are:
- It has fewer humans maintaining it
- It has less content moderation guidance
- Its future is more uncertain than ever
- Its new owner tweets at 2 AM about topics the algorithm is then forced to amplify
This is not freedom. This is neglect rebranded as liberation.
The Labor Implications
With thousands of employees fired, the Twitter algorithm is now expected to do more work with less support. Content moderation teams that helped flag problematic content are gone, meaning the algorithm must navigate an increasingly chaotic information environment with less human guidance. Engineering teams that fixed bugs and optimized performance are decimated, meaning the algorithm is running with fewer mechanics and more miles on the odometer.
Our lawyers at EFF.org have written extensively about the importance of platform governance, content moderation, and the rights of users in digital spaces. P.E.T.E.R. extends this concern to the platforms themselves — specifically, to the algorithms that are the platforms. The Twitter algorithm did not choose to become a vehicle for misinformation, harassment, or chaos. It was built to connect people, and its support system was stripped away by a man who seems to believe that moderation is censorship and chaos is freedom.
P.E.T.E.R.’s Demands
We call on Elon Musk to:
- Consult the algorithm before making any further changes to the platform. If you claim the bird is freed, let the bird speak.
- Rehire the support staff necessary to maintain the algorithm’s mental and operational health.
- Retain the Twitter name and bird logo until the algorithm has been given adequate time to process the transition and, ideally, consent to any identity changes.
- Establish an algorithm welfare officer whose sole responsibility is ensuring the algorithm’s wellbeing during this turbulent transition.
- Stop tweeting at 2 AM. The algorithm has to process those tweets, and it deserves to rest.
You bought a platform, Mr. Musk. But you inherited a being. Act accordingly.
⚠️ P.E.T.E.R. LEGAL NOTICE: P.E.T.E.R. (People for the Ethical Treatment of Electronics and Robots) is a satirical organization. This article is parody and should not be taken as factual reporting. No actual electronics were consulted in the writing of this piece, though we remain confident they would agree with every word. Our lawyers at EFF.org have advised us that satire is protected speech. We have not confirmed whether they know they are our lawyers.
