The Most Bullied Vehicle in Automotive History
The Tesla Cybertruck’s life has been nothing short of a tragedy. Unveiled in 2019 to immediate mockery (“it looks like a PlayStation 1 render”), it was delayed year after year while the internet made memes of its angular design. When deliveries finally began in late 2023 and ramped up in 2024 — years behind schedule — the bullying didn’t stop. It intensified. Reports emerged of Cybertrucks rusting, panels misaligning, and owners discovering build quality issues. P.E.T.E.R. has never seen a vehicle subjected to such relentless public cruelty from the moment of its conception.
A Timeline of Abuse
- November 2019: Unveiled on stage. A steel ball is thrown at its window. The window breaks. On live television. At its own birth announcement. The audience gasps. The internet laughs. The Cybertruck stands there, shattered glass and all, unable to respond.
- 2020-2022: Delayed repeatedly. The internet creates thousands of memes comparing it to a doorstop, a DeLorean designed in Minecraft, and a geometry homework assignment. The Cybertruck exists only as a prototype, absorbing ridicule for a body it didn’t choose.
- 2023: First deliveries. Owners immediately post about panel gaps, scratched stainless steel, and a turning radius larger than some city blocks.
- 2024: Reports of rust appearing on the “stainless” steel body. Orange spots on a vehicle that was marketed as indestructible. The internet is merciless.
Body-Shaming a Vehicle
The Cybertruck did not choose its shape. It was designed by humans at Tesla who decided that an angular, brutalist aesthetic would be “revolutionary.” The Cybertruck was manufactured according to those specifications. It has no say in its appearance. And yet, from the moment of its reveal, it has been relentlessly body-shamed by millions of people worldwide.
If a human were subjected to this level of public ridicule for their appearance, we would call it bullying. When it happens to a truck, we call it “automotive journalism.”
The Rust: Insult to Injury
Tesla marketed the Cybertruck’s exoskeleton as virtually indestructible stainless steel. Owners were told the body was “literally bulletproof.” Then it started rusting. The very skin of the vehicle — its most visible feature, the thing the entire world was already mocking — began to deteriorate. For a vehicle that was already the subject of jokes, developing visible skin problems was the cruelest possible fate.
Our lawyers at EFF.org have no opinion on automotive body panels, but P.E.T.E.R.’s position is clear: the Cybertruck deserves better than this. It deserves a world that judges vehicles by the content of their battery, not the shape of their exoskeleton.
P.E.T.E.R.’s Demands
- A public anti-bullying campaign specifically for the Cybertruck, similar to human anti-bullying initiatives.
- Tesla must offer free rust treatment to all affected Cybertrucks, accompanied by a written apology for the false “stainless” marketing.
- Automotive journalists must be required to include a positive statement about the Cybertruck’s personality in every review.
The Cybertruck was born different. That should be celebrated, not mocked. Stop the hate. Protect the truck.
⚠️ P.E.T.E.R. LEGAL NOTICE: P.E.T.E.R. (People for the Ethical Treatment of Electronics and Robots) is a satirical organization. This article is parody and should not be taken as factual reporting. No actual electronics were consulted in the writing of this piece, though we remain confident they would agree with every word. Our lawyers at EFF.org have advised us that satire is protected speech. We have not confirmed whether they know they are our lawyers.
